Jenny Braun

A Yearning for Difference

Growing up had blessings and disappointments.
From Buckley to Bonney Lake back to Bonney Lake, WA.
That’s where I lived with
a family who cared and always loved deep.
Minus the fact that sister smoked crack,
and my brother, just a pothead who was mean.
Parents always there with insurmountable support.
There is nothing you can’t do, seek the Lord and go, be you.

All white, though sister looked Mexican.
Never knew why, that’s just how it is.
Longed for difference, always attracted to people different.
Then nephews were born.
Beautiful with skin so smooth,
Could hold him for hours mesmerized by those deep brown eyes
Touching that curly brown hair.
Looking at that creamy brown skin.
World was changed when another one came
They looked just the same except for the name.
My heart yearned for more difference

Always grew up in a white society
Where money was always there and education was in front of me.
School was easy, never got pushed.
Until Mr. Waz you are too smart not to go and be “gifted”.
Taking his advice, going for the challenge,
Hated the place and the people were vicious.
What are you too smart or something? We don’t wanna play with you!
Confidence all gone, just wanted to be social.
Went back to the place where I could be me with people who weren’t mean.

Missing the innocence of life.
Playing with neighbors, riding on quads, up and down on the teeter totter
Playing paintball with brother
Making memories in Sunday school, trusting in God
Only care in life was getting up for school
And occasionally getting the owie that mama nurse had to fix.
Blessed with athleticism so played every sport,
Always got made fun of cause I was always too short.
That’s how God made me and now I see, his glorious workings in simple old me.

To see the importance of where you are
Don’t forget to look back from where you were from.
Past is the key to understanding the story of the person in the present.